[Long shot of mysterious deep red barn out in the woods. Camera closes in to the front of the barn. View of Pentagram that was burned into the top of the door as if by a branding iron. It is smoking and glowing a brighter red than the barn. Door opens by itself. Camera dollies into the barn. A group of hooded cult worshipers circle a pit of coals where a giant spear is holding aloft the dead head of a hog. They hold hands as their leader at the head of the circle atones a speech:]
"Return to us, oh, Father Mother Hog!"
"Hog of the Wallow," chant the supplicants as a whole.
"Awaken to our pleas, descend from Hog Heaven and bestow upon us your blessings."
"Hear us, oh Blessed Hog."
[The leader reaches down to his feet and picks up a black velvet bag. He opens the bag, reaches inside, and grabs a handful of pork rinds to toss into the fire. The fire sputters in infernal sparks and flames grow higher.]
"Hear us, oh Anointed Hog of the Spirit, Hog of the Eternal Night, Sweet Hog of Ours," says the leader.
"Sweet Hog of Ours," chant the supplicants.
"Return to us this night and greet us with the vengeance we so desire on those who mock and hunt you down. Return to this wretched ball of rot we call Earth and root out the unbelievers and let them feel the wrath of your terrible swift snout."
"We beckon to you, oh Hog of Feral Majesty."
[Camera reveals the group dropping off their hoods to reveal the women in camouflage bikinis and the men dressed only in camouflage butcher aprons, both smeared with blood.]
"Let he who was deemed unclean cleanse the filth from our sights and redeem us all as we sacrifice the head of this beast to the promise of your awakening, " says the leader. "Hog of Birth, give us your litters, as we heed the snorting trumpeting of your heralded rebirth."
[The leader and the supplicants now take out the infamous Arkansas Razorback hats and place them on their heads. They begin to chant.]
"YEOOS GIP OOW! YEOOS GIP OOW! YEOOS GIP OOW!"
[Note: Woo Pig Sooey, backwards.]
[Close up shot of the eyes of the pig head, now glowing brighter than the flames themselves.]
[Swipe fade out, as employed in the restored original film.]
[Camera crane shot of the truck and trailer seen at the end of the original film, cruising down the highway with its Hogzilla cargo. Camera moves down to focus into the cabin of the truck, where both the men who were dickering over the Hogzilla body are smoking cigars and chuckling.]
First man: "I take it back, $600 is a fair price, just so long as I'm guest of honor at that barbecue you going to have with that porker back there."
Second man, the driver, puffs on his cigar: "That back bacon and fat'll be dripping hot over the coals before you know it, brother."
"Ha, I feel like digging into a hunk of wild pork right this minute. I can already taste that beast meat going down the old gullet."
"Damn straight."
"The whole town'll be clamoring to get them a slice, when they see that Hogzilla a-roasting on the spit."
"Hope we can find us a spit big enough to spike it."
"We'll come up with something. Jake the Butcher probably has a pole we can sharpen out back of his store."
[Suddenly, the cabin begins shaking. Now the whole truck is shaking. Violently now. The driver is having a hard time holding onto the steering wheel.]
"What the holy hell," shouts the driver.
"Hell, you say," shouts the passenger. "Something making us move."
"Yeah, you know what the something is?"
"Can't be, it's gone up to Hog Heaven, or wherever they go."
"No it's ... it's ... ALIVE !!!"
[Grotesque snorting sound. Two giant tusks crash into the back window of the cabin and spear the two men dead as the truck crashes into a ditch.]
[Swipe fade]
[Long camera shot of a shotgun shack somewhere in a ritzy suburban swamp park in Florida. Camera moves closer to focus on the deranged mountain man of the first film, rocking slowly in a rocking chair. Thoughtfully, he takes a bottle of Lone Star Beer off a table next to him and sips it. He lays it down, and speaks.]
"Ain't no getting around it, other white meat is unclean."
[He picks up the bottle, sips, puts it down. Silence as he thinks. He says.]
"Unclean as it were before, unclean as it is now."
[He leans forward on his rocking chair, and gazes up into the sky.]
"Another storm is coming. Worst than the other one. Worser than we ever seen. Raining squirming creatures into the woods out yonder. Raining them in litters."
[He pauses and thinks on what he just said. Grunts. Shakes his head. Drinks from his bottle. Sets it down. Speaks.]
"When I first saw them in the woods, they were talking about Deliverance, but from what, hell, I don't know. I looked at that fat boy amongst them and I says to them 'Looks like you brought you a big hog with you. What did you do, bring this one to mate with the other one?' How was I to know I was some ... some ... prophet or other of a litter to come?"
[He squints, with a pained expression, and shakes his head.]
"I told them they was asking for big trouble, eating pork out in those woods. I told them that. I knows I did. Maybe should have told them why. That giant hog didn't want any human eating its meat, because ..."
[He pauses and snorts to himself.]
... he'd find his own meat amongst them and start a-fixing to a-making bacon. And like I told them, he'd really have a hankering for that fat boy."
[Frenetic camera switch to the giant Hogzilla of the original film dragging a semi-conscious Frank into the woods by its mouth, grunting and growling as it does.]
[Camera switches back to the mountain man sipping his beer, puts it down, speaks again.]
"Damn hog took that fat boy back to wherever it came from and had its way with him. I knows it. He saw that boy like a little piggy and he wanted a piece of its roast beef."
[Frenetic camera switch to giant hog mounting Fat Frank who is moaning "Stop it, stop it, don't pork me, don't put that THING into me."]
[Back to the mountain man, where the camera is on tight focus of his bearded, craggy face. He speaks.]
"Then he eats him up. Alive like."
[Frenetic camera switch showing Hogzilla feasting on the quivering open body of Frank.]
[Back to close up of mountain man, speaking:]
"Ate him up like some kinda ... unholy communion." [Shakes his head at the camera, speaking into it.] "How was I to know that ... it was taking that fat boy into its gut for ... a birthing. Cause after I shot the beast, I heard from somewhere's beyond that it had dropped a litter before I could put a stop to it. And now ... and now ... it's done given us ..."
[Slowly, he tells the camera:]
" ... a goddamn FRANKENHOG."
[From out of nowhere, we hear a savage snorting sound. As if hearing the sound itself, the camera backs away swiftly. It is showing the mountain man arising from his rocking chair, which continues rocking as he goes into the shack and returns with his tusk staff in one hand and his other hand cradling a shotgun.]
[He speaks.]
"I knows now I was brought onto this Earth for one reason, only. Kill the damn big hogs. Kill them but good. Until this world no longer knows of them or their breed. It's my job and I thought I could rest after I got the first one. But now ... I really got my work to do."
[As he slowly vanishes into the air, we hear him say again.]
"Other meat, thinking it's the first meat. Makes no difference, it's always unclean."
[TO BE CONTINUED]
No comments:
Post a Comment